Tuesday, March 15, 2011

How to tie a bead fly

Here is the secret formula for tying a bead fly. No thread, vice, or tying material is needed...since it isn't actually a fly.

1. Stick some toothpicks in an apple

2. Swipe some nail polish off of your chick

3. Shove some beads in the toothpicks

4. Paint with secret polish color

5. Let dry...no need to whip finish, since it isn't a fly

6. Remove beads and toothpics. Eat apple.

7. Throw the bead on your leader under a bobber with some split shot, stick something in the hole to hold it in place 4 inches above a bare hook...maybe triple it up if you want the old chain link fence or something like that. Motor up runs in your "driftboat". Side drift, set the hook often...sometimes they even get hooked in the mouth vicinity.

8. Continue pounding run until the fish stop "eating" your bare hook under the bead "fly". Continue sidedrifting down to the next good run and set the hook often...you might snag one on the way downriver. Ask people in every other boat you see "how many they got" and feel good about yourself. The number of fish you hook will overpower the guilt that is billowing inside of your angling soul as you continue masquerading as a fly angler.

9. By the way, this method is illegal...so don't get caught!


  1. Niiice!!!finally out of the closet....RTH

  2. Dude now you are talking...you can't be from the mid west and now throw a bead and a bobber...now do a lesson on fishing a spin'n glo and we'll be good.

  3. The next lesson on how to masquerade as a fly fisherman will be about how to rig a dough-ball on a treble hook and cast it with a fly rod. South Bend style...